Sunday, December 20, 2015

The Quest for Starbucks

Last month I went on a historical tour of the University, led by a postgraduate student. We started at the top of the mountain at New Asia College, which enjoys the best view of Sha Tin Bay and the Eastern New Territories. From there we wound our way down to the base, using the hidden elevators of various academic buildings to save our legs. (Since then, I have made frequent use of these shortcuts; missing the bus up to the main quad is no longer such a daunting prospect.)

On our way down, our guide provided an explanation for a mystery that had been dogging me the whole term: where were all the popular chain restaurants and cafes? According to him, unlike their establishment rivals at Hong Kong U, the CUHK student body has dedicated itself to social justice, keeping corporations off-campus. Instead the student canteens are supplemented by various co-opts run by locals.

HOW GRAND. I thought I had left such self-righteous localized eccentricity behind in Hyde Park, the Land of Three Bars. Don't get me wrong; social justice is is all well and  good--I dabble in it from time to time--but I need Starbucks dammit. I don't even really like Starbucks- but in an emergency (i.e. waking up every morning) it'll do. Starbucks in HK is even more obnoxiously overpriced than in the U.S., but their coffee and service is simply better than a co-op like "Cafe 330." That place apparently employs people dealing with learning disorders, so of course I feel like an ass disparaging it. It's a really, really good idea, and so I try to occasionally support them. STILL, in my short-sighted, non-idealistic moments I crave the consistent quality and efficiency that only corporate greed delivers.

As I was contemplating suicide, our guide whispered under his breath that there WAS in fact a Starbucks on campus "up that way" [points vaguely to the East]. This miracle existed despite a recent student and alumni referendum. Thus began my week-long quest to find the damn thing. Eventually I narrowed my search to the brand-new S.Ho. College. It's fancy canteen for what assumed were the rich entitled, kids seemed like the best place for a tax-dodging franchise. And lo and behold, there it was, nestled in the corner of the cafeteria without any signage of course!

It's not really Starbucks. The baristas are regular canteen staff and all they serve are espresso drinks. Since I don't actually like Starbucks drip coffee, that's ok. Plus what they do have is ridiculously cheap, even by American standards. I'm going to consider that mission accomplished. With any luck, the social justice warriors will soon head back to Central with their umbrellas, giving me a chance to organize a coup behind their backs and get a decent burger joint in here.